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My Top 10 Movies of 2013

January 5, 2014

10. Pain & Gain – R

This was WAY better than I expected.  It was quite funny and entertaining.

09. Star Trek Into Darkness – PG-13

The more I think about it the more certain aspects of the movie irritate me, but I have seen it three times and still think it’s entertaining.  Not as good as the first, but rock solid.

08. Iron Man 3 – PG-13

A solid franchise for sure.

07. Kick-Ass 2 – R

Again, not as solid as the first one but still quite good.

06. This is the End – R

If you like Franco, Rogen, and the rest of the Appatowan gang then you should be happy.

05. The Brass Teapot – R

I love me some Juno Temple.

04. Prisoners – R

I was watching this while compiling my list. Wow.  It certainly got my attention. It starts out somewhat lethargically but I think it’s worth it.

03. Sound City – NR

An awesome documentary about a legendary studio and sound board.  Quite good.

02. Warm Bodies – PG 13

Another fresh take on zombies.

01. Mental – NR

The Sound of Music Aussie style.  Funny stuff.


My Top 10 Least Favorite Movies of 2013

January 5, 2014

10. The Place Beyond the Pines – R

I wanted to like this one. It had an excellent cast, but ultimately I was disappointed. I didn’t hate it, but I didn’t like it.

09. Computer Chess – NR

I guess the filmmakers were just too smart for me.

08. Identity Thief – R

Completely generic, and a waste of good talent.

07.  Bullet to the Head – R

Hard to find anything good about the film.

06. Movie 43 – R

Hardly a movie. Just a compilation of shorts. Some of them were pretty funny, but it mostly fell flat.

05. A Good Day to Die Hard – R

By far the worst in the franchise. I hope the next one doesn’t suck so much.

04. Fright Night 2: New Blood – R

I didn’t expect much.  I wasn’t disappointed.

03. The Internship – PG 13

The trailers didn’t look promising, and the movie was just a giant commercial for Google.

02. Grown Ups 2 – PG 13

I hated the first one. Thought it was one of the worst comedies I have ever seen. They somehow made this one worse.  Good job.

01. Welcome to the Punch – R

I stopped watching it about twenty minutes in.  Leave the Guy Ritchie films to Guy Ritchie.

The movies of 2013 that I have seen

January 5, 2014

Fright Night 2: New Blood
I Am Bruce Lee
Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters
Movie 43
Sound City
Bullet to the Head
Warm Bodies
Identity Thief
A Good Day to Die Hard
Oz the Great and Powerful
The Incredible Burt Wonderstone
Olympus Has Fallen
G.I. Joe: Retaliation
Welcome to the Punch
The Place Beyond the Pines
The Brass Teapot
Sexy Evil Genius
Pain & Gain
Iron Man 3
Star Trek Into Darkness
The Hangover 3
Fast and Furious 6
Now You See Me
Superman: Unbound
The Internship
This is the End
Man of Steel
World War Z
The Heat
White House Down
Grown Ups 2
Pacific Rim
Computer Chess
The Wolverine
Justice League: The Flashpoint Paradox
2 Guns
Cockneys vs. Zombies
We’re the Millers
Kick-Ass 2
The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones
The World’s End
Metallica Through the Never
Zero Charisma
The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

I intend to see the following films:

Despicable Me 2
Monsters University
Insidious Chapter 2
As I Lay Dying
Machete Kills
Ender’s Game
Thor: The Dark World
The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty
Anchorman: The Legend Continues

2012 in review

January 31, 2013

The stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

600 people reached the top of Mt. Everest in 2012. This blog got about 6,700 views in 2012. If every person who reached the top of Mt. Everest viewed this blog, it would have taken 11 years to get that many views.

Click here to see the complete report.

My Top 10 Movies of 2012

January 31, 2013

10. Some Guy Who Kills People – R

I saw a lot of low-budget films this year that could have easily been included on this top ten list. I probably like this one more than the next film on the list, but the premise of that one is just too perfect.

09. God Bless America – R

A guy gets fed up, and goes cross-country eliminating people he deems to be a pox on society. I was sold within the first five minutes. Well, truth be told, I was sold on the premise alone, but Bobcat Goldthwait delivers.

08. Goon – R

Hockey movie about an enforcer.  I loved it.  I wish I could have ranked it higher.

07. Bernie – PG-13

Jack Black is underrated.  This quasi-documentary about a real murder is quite entertaining.

06. Seeking a Friend for the End of the World – R

I really enjoyed this one, and it reminded me how much I like Keira Knightley.

05. Jason Becker: Not Dead Yet – NR

It’s like watching a documentary on Mozart, but with actual video of Mozart.  I’ve been a fan of Becker for many years, and was looking forward to watching his tragic, inspiring, and humbling story in movie form.

04. Skyfall – PG-13

Best Bond movie ever?  I don’t know, but I guess I can’t think of one that is better.  Bardem is definitely the best Bond Villain ever. The only thing I can think of that would have made it better is if Sean Connery had been the groundskeeper.

03. The Dark Knight Rises – PG-13

I didn’t see how they could make a film anywhere close to The Dark Knight, but Nolan did so while also bringing his three Batman films to an awesome conclusion.

02. The Avengers – PG-13

This was actually an awesome year for movies.  It was hard narrowing down to 10 films let alone the order.  Joss Whedon made the quintessential super hero team movie here.

01. Moonrise Kingdom – PG-13

I still think I give the edge to The Royal Tenenbaums for being my favorite Wes Anderson film, but Moonrise is probably actually a better film. It’s everything you’d expect from Anderson, and done to perfection.

My Top 10 Least Favorite Movies of 2012

January 31, 2013

10. Jeff, Who Lives at Home – R

This movie wasn’t completely trash, but it just didn’t do enough for me.  It had a solid cast, and that counts against it because I expected a bit more.

09. John Carter – PG-13

It’s an action movie with aliens.  That, the always awesome Mark Strong, and the smoking hot Lynn Collins is about all it had going for it.

08. The Expendables 2 – R

I really enjoyed the first one, but this one had way too many nudge-nudge moments of taking jabs at the cast’s previous roles.  One or two every ten minutes is fine, but there were like 10 in 1 minute.  The plot wasn’t nearly as good as the first one, and that is kind of sad.

07. The Five-Year Engagement – R

What is with Jason Segal and writing roles for himself where he ends up cheating on the woman he loves?  Hard to like that kind of character.

06. Ruby Sparks – R

I liked the concept, and the cast performed quite well.  The problem, like in the previous film on the list, is that the protagonist does something that is unforgivable.  Even more so than hypocritical infidelity.  So, screw him. I hope he dies unhappy and alone.

05. Snow White and the Huntsman – PG-13

Kristen Stewart might have been the best thing about the film.  Yeah, it’s that bad. I lie of course, because Charlize Theron was actually good.  She just didn’t have anything to work with.

04. Detention – R

I had low expectations, and even they were not met.

03. Red Tails – PG-13

I still think Lucas produced this to show that Episode II wasn’t actually that bad.  In that, he almost succeeded.

02. The Three Stooges – PG

As bad as I expected.

01. Wrath of the Titans – PG-13

I didn’t watch the first one.  So, maybe that would have helped?  I doubt it though.

The movies of 2012 that I have seen

January 31, 2013

Red Tails
The Woman in Black
Safe House
Act of Valor
John Carter
21 Jump Street
Jeff, Who Lives at Home
The Hunger Games
Mirror Mirror
The Cabin in the Woods
The Three Stooges
Jesus Henry Christ
The Five-Year Engagement
The Giant Mechanical Man
Marvel’s The Avengers
God Bless America
The Dictator
Men in Black 3
Moonrise Kingdom
Snow White and the Huntsman
Safety Not Guaranteed
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter
Seeking a Friend for the End of the World
The Amazing Spider-Man
Some Guy Who Kills People
Get the Gringo
The Dark Knight Rises
Ruby Sparks
The Watch
Total Recall
The Bourne Legacy
The Campaign
Premium Rush
The Revenant
The Inbetweeners
The Expendables 2
Trouble with the Curve
Jason Becker: Not Dead Yet
Wrath of the Titans
The Grey
Cloud Atlas
The Words

I intend to see the following films:

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey
Jack Reacher
Les Miserables
Mission to Lars