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Stealing Harvard (2002 – PG-13)

March 29, 2009

Originally posted on November 24, 2003


Stealing Harvard is the story of a dependable and loving uncle whp promises his young niece that he would pay for her college in an effort to cheer her up.  He, of course, forgot all about it, but she did not.  Now he has to come up with the money.  Should he use the money that he and his fiance have been saving for years?  That won’t work, because he can’t hurt his fiance.  The only option left… steal it of course.  I like the premise it lends itself well for comedic moments.

Story = 20


Tom Green, Jason Lee, Leslie Mann, Dennis Farina, Megan Mullally, John C. McGinley, Chris Penn, Richard Jenkins, and Bruce McCulloch the former Kid in the Hall that also directed.  I really like Lee, Mann, and McGinley, and this is the first movie I have seen with Tom Green that didn’t make my skin crawl in disgust and irritation.  In fact, I actually quite enjoyed his character in this film.  Any time I see someone from Freaks and Geeks, I have to mention it.  Martin Starr was THE geek in that show.  Man, I really loved that show.  Canceled after only one season.  What a bucket of piss.

Cast = 20

(EDIT from 2009 – How did I leave off Seymour Cassel?  His part is awesome too.)


A little Peaches and Herb & Andrew WK anyone?  Not the world’s greatest soundtrack, but they use what they got well.

Soundtrack/Score = 16

Quote/Catch Phrase

“Well, I guess I couldn’t visualize too well since there was a gun pointed at my mind’s eye!”  “I’m not liquid.”  “Get up, get out, get up get out, get up, get out, don’t touch my door!”  “I wanted to scope the place out.  I was hungry so I decided to heat up a brick of cheese.  I need my cheese.”  “Duff: Maybe we can use slingshots to rob the place.  John: A slingshot is not a real weapon Duff.  Duff: Oh yeah, well why don’t you define what a real weapon is for me while I shoot this plastic baby doll into your temple at 180 miles per hour!”  Good stuff.

Quote/Catch Phrase = 20


Admittedly, not everyone is going to like this movie.  Think Old School but less raunchy, and not quite as funny.  If you like that kind of movie… this is right up your alley.  If not, it will probably annoy you.

Rewatchability = 16

Total Score = 92

Wow, that scored a tad higher than I originally expected, but that’s not a bad thing.  I like this movie a lot.  It’s a good one to watch with a bunch of people who have a little too much sugar in their system.

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